Winning

Repetition is the key to learning or so the saying goes. In my case, absolutely true. There are certain subjects I need to hear over and over again and in different settings so that each time I can absorb a little more.

An article I read today was one such experience. The article was in Runner's World and was about positive thinking and quieting your inner critic. Honestly, this has been an attitude that David has been trying to get me to adopt for just about, oh, FOREVER! But you know, it is so hard...for me at least.

Yes I know that there is a way or path for us to be better. Through our Savior's atonement we can improve ourselves through the grace He extends to us. Sometimes I resent knowing this because it takes away all my excuses. It would be so much easier to say "hey, I'm a cranky crabby-pants person. Deal with it because I can't change," but I know this is not true and so hard work is required.

Hard work, as much as I like to think that I am a hard worker, when it comes to addressing personality flaws (or mental toughness in athletic endeavors), I tend to go right to the line and then quit. Well, maybe I'll fake it for awhile or sort-of half-a$$ try, but an honest reflection shows that there is so much more that I can do. And then sometimes I enter into a very negative self-talk cycle, berating myself for not trying hard enough, not being strong enough, not appreciating the Savior's sacrifice and grace, and the list of degrading comments goes on and on until I'm either trying to hide my tears from Dave so he won't worry or I'm being mean and nasty to hide how miserable I'm feeling.

But today I found guidance in the magazine article. It's interesting to me that the article didn't really offer any new insights, mostly just reinforced what I have known for a long time and have heard in many different venues. Today, however, a simple article about improving running performance by quieting the inner critic spoke to my soul as a way to improve my overall self-view.

Find the positive, the article said. Find the positive even if it is a small thing. And realize that sometimes there will be bad days, but consider those "feedback" days. If the workout (or day) was a good one, mark it is as a "win".

So here are two "wins" for today.

First, I had a great speed work run. It was a great run because after I had exhausted all of my excuses I got myself out the door and got the run done. Once out, my legs felt like lead during the warm-up and I was worried. But I didn't let that worry set off the critic in my head. I practiced saying more positive statements and reminding myself that I would be stronger for the work I put in tonight. So I just kept pushing through and I wound up running some great split times on my intervals; matter of fact, the intervals were at a faster pace than I was expecting and I was able to hold that pace for each interval. WIN!

Second win was that I made a successful crock-pot dinner. Our family doesn't always like crock-pot dinners because sometimes the food gets too mushy. We had spaghetti. It was a win because first and foremost I actually got everything in the crock-pot in time to make dinner. It was a win because the noodles cooked without turning to mush and it actually tasted good. WIN!

Surprise for the Weekend

I generally am not a fan of surprises.

Surprises throw me off because I have control issues.

But last Thursday night I got a surprise I didn't mind.

Katelyn came home for the weekend.

She rang the doorbell and Carson answered it.

Dave was in the family room and asked "Who is it?"

Carson said it was Kate.

Dave thought he meant Katie from across the street since she had come over earlier to ask Dave to come out and play with her.

Dave told Carson to tell Kate that he couldn't come out right now.

By this time, Katelyn was walking around the corner and Dave figured out what Kate Carson meant.

We've had a fun weekend with her.

We mostly just hung out.

I did take her shopping for running shoes and work-out gear.

Oh I could easily spend way too much money on work-out gear.

I also took her for her first run.

We ran one minute, walked one minute for 30 minutes.

My little non-runner did great.

I'm looking forward to our color run in July.

I'm kinda sad to see her leave this morning to head back to Rexburg, but I'll see her in a month.

Thanks for a great surprise Katelyn.

Work-outs Completed This Week

Well there were a few successes and some missed opportunities.

I spent a lot of the time this week frustrated with myself for not getting myself out the door to run. I definitely do better at getting my runs in if I have someone to run with. Then yesterday I realized that how lame that excuse was and that I have a running buddy who is always hoping I'll get out and get running. Josie, I promise to do better next week.

Monday I did join the ladies group at The Bike Hub for a group bike ride. We rode about 20 miles which was a little farther that I had expected to go for my 2nd ride of the season, but I was in it so I just had to keep going. I found that I did better than I had expected I would, so that was exciting.

Tuesday morning I swam. I'm still trying to find time in my schedule to get back to the master's swim class. It's just that the class is at 5:30 p.m. on Monday and Wednesday nights.  Monday's are out because of the group bike ride. Wednesday's could work, but 5:30 is just such an awkward time because the boys are home and they expect something to be made for dinner. Yes, they are more than capable of preparing their own meal but Dave has late work calls on Monday and Tuesday (he gets home around 7:30 or 8) so Wednesday feels like it should be family dinner time, not mom is at swimming time.

Wednesday: well I didn't do anything on Wednesday even though I should have done a run. And I should have done a run on Monday, but I didn't.

Thursday was actually an accidental success. There is a running group that meets at 6 p.m. Thursday night and since I hadn't run yet this week I decided I would go. My friend Jen said she would come too and before we knew it, the 3 miles we were planning on running turned into 5 miles. Oh it was so nice.

Friday morning was super chilly, but sunny so we went ahead with our planned bike ride. We got in 18 miles. My feet were so numb by time we got back and I discovered that cold muscles don't loving pedaling up hills, even small ones.

Tomorrow I'm set for a bike ride provided the weather holds and I'm trying to get Katelyn (yes she's home. She surprised us for the weekend) out for a run/walk program tomorrow.

Biased

I don't know if every insurance company is biased against boys, but ours appears to be.

Carson was in a small fender bender last week. And when I say small, I mean to the point that there  was no visible damage to the truck and a small dent on the other car ($400 quote). There was no police involvement.

When Katelyn was in high school she rear-ended a car. She was ticketed for the accident. Then this past winter she hit another car. There was no ticket issued that time, although I think the police were called. Each wreck caused about $3000 to the other cars.

Guess which kid the insurance company called about.

Carson.

I couldn't believe it when the insurance investigator called about his accident. In my eyes, his wreck was small potatoes compared to the incidents that Katelyn has been involved in and yet we never heard "boo" from the insurance company with Katelyn (oh, but we did see our rates increase).

So what gives? Katelyn has demonstrated that she is more of a liability to the insurance company than Carson, but he is the one who was targeted. That is just not right.

Oh and Carson's fender bender...it was because the girl who was driving the other car first let him start to back out of the parking spot, then sped past him, and then stopped abruptly to let another car back out. I bet her insurance company didn't call and 20-question her.

Well I'm waiting to hear more from the insurance company because I informed the investigator that Carson has a string of text messages from the girl first saying she wasn't going to turn in the claim (obviously she did), then she only wants us to pay $400 of the $1150 quote because that quote included repairing damage from previous accidents, and finally that she was withdrawing the insurance claim. Does anyone know, can I forward text messages to an e-mail address? Or can I download them from our account on our cell phone provider's website?

Getting Started

I have been consistently running for about 5 years. I have always encouraged Katelyn and Carson to go with me, but they have always said "NO THANKS!" So imagine my surprise when Katelyn suggested I come down and run the Color Run with her in Rexburg. Well actually the conversation went more like this:

Katelyn: "Hey I thought about doing this until I saw that it was a run, but you should come down and do it"

Me: "These kind of "runs" are usually more of a run/walk activity. We should totally do it together."

Katelyn: "Um, ugh, OK"

Me: "Great. I'll sign us up."

Katelyn: "Wait, I'm not so sure."

Me: "Too late. Find a friend to train with so it will be more fun"

Katelyn: "Ok, I have a few I could ask."

So it's official; we are going to do the ColorInMotion 5k in July. I'm trying to contain my excitement and not go overboard in giving training advice. Katelyn said I could give it, but there was no guarantee she would follow it.

With that in mind, here are the first couple of training tips.

1. You can run almost any type of shorts and t-shirt, but it is a MUST to have quality running shoes. Having the proper shoes that fit correctly will make training much more enjoyable and will help prevent injuries. The best place to get quality running shoes is not at any of the big-box stores. No, the best place to get good running shoes is at a specialty running store. When you go, make sure they check your ankle strength, arch of your foot, stride, etc. Tell them you are a beginner and are training for a 5k. The whole fitting process will take some time so budget at least 45 minutes. And don't choke when they tell you the price of the shoes. You have to pay for quality.

2. Probably the second most important item is a good running bra. I can't stress enough how important it is to get one that is comfortable and will keep the "girls" in place. If there is a lot of bouncing not only will it be uncomfortable painful, but it will also create chafing. And OH NELLIE is chafing bad news! Moving Comfort is a good brand. Title 9 also has some good bras to chose from. I would suggest going to a department store to get measured for a bra and then looking on-line at Title 9's website. Again, just like shoes, don't go for cheapest. It's usually not worth it.

Stay tuned for more tips on how to build up your time and distance. You don't want to start out too fast or you'll wind up not enjoying the running.

A Training Schedule for Motivation and Accountability

My running partner is supposed to be out of commission for the next couple of months. That means that I have to hold myself accountable for getting in the miles for the triathlon I am looking to participate in in July. So I'm going to document what my weekly schedule should be and then report how the week went.

Monday will start the training.

Monday morning: Run (speed work: either hill repeats or intervals)

Tuesday morning: Swim
Tuesday evening:  Bike

Wednesday morning: Run (tempo)
Wednesday evening:  Bike (maybe join a group ride at one of the local bike shops)

Thursday morning: Cross-train (usually a 20/20/20 class at the Club)

Friday morning: Rest
Friday afternoon: Swim

Saturday morning: Long run


I realize that is pretty vague since I didn't include any mileages, but I'm not too worried about  miles. The triathlon I want to do is a sprint triathlon so I figure as long as I ride at least an hour each ride and swim for 30-45 minutes I should be fine.

After I get some swims under my belt I'll probably get back into the master's swim class and that will help increase my swim speed. Why am I waiting? Um because I don't want to embarrass myself and have to swim in the "special class" lane.

What I've Done in School Nursing Lately

Spring and nice weather always brings more busyness in the health room, particularly at the elementary school. We see more scraped knees and elbows; more broken blisters from swinging on the monkey bars; more itchy eyes and runny noses because of increased pollen count. There are also more bug bites and bee stings. Those are the typical things. During the last week or so there has also been a bad cut lip because the student crashed on her bike during bike safety class; ironic, I know. There was a sprained wrist from playing fly-up at recess. I have also been busy preparing final immunization notices for 5th grade students who need a Tdap shot before starting 6th grade in the fall. And there is always the end-of-the year paperwork to send to parents with students who take/have medication at school or have an emergency care plan. I will also be presenting human growth and development at the end of May to the 5th grade girls.

The middle school has its share of busyness as well. Last week I sent a girl to the doctor with a suspected broken bone; it was. Yesterday I sent a  boy to the doctor with a suspected ACL injury; not sure of the outcome but I'm sure I will hear something when I go to the middle school this afternoon. The middle school also has the typical "I don't feel well" kiddos who really just need a 10 minute re-set rest and then they are good to go.

All of those types of things I'm pretty well-prepared to deal with. What I'm not always ready for is the "counseling" that sometimes goes into my job, especially at the middle school where their problems seem to be a bit more complicated. Last week I helped a young lady prepare to have a conversation with her guardian about wearing tampons. She said she has attempted this conversation in the past, but it has not gone well and usually ends in door-slamming and frustration on both parts. So we talked about why she wants to wear tampons (comfort, able to participate in more activities, don't have to worry about them showing through clothes) and why her guardian is against it ("tampons are only for girls having sex"). We talked about ways to start the conversation, how to be respectful of each other's views, etc. I asked if there was another female family member who she could turn to for help and she indicated that there was. She left my office feeling confident and ready to have a respectful conversation with her guardian.

I guess the advice was good and the conversation went pretty well. This young woman has decided that I am a pretty safe, non-judgmental person to talk to because the next conversation was a little more intense. She needed information on pregnancy testing, how old did she need to be to make her own decisions, where she could go, etc. So we talked about all of those things. She didn't want her guardian to know. I explained that even though the State of Washington has said that 14 year-olds can make their own decisions regarding reproductive health, 14-years olds need adult guidance on these important, life-changing decisions. I said I was glad that she comfortable enough with me to discuss these things, but my ability to help her was pretty limited. I said multiple times during the course of our conversation she needs to have a conversation with her guardian. She will need a strong support system to help her deal with the consequences of her decision to have sex. I told her there are always consequences, it could be a pregnancy, a STI (they are called infections now, not disease), a broken heart, but there always consequences. She understood the need to talk with her guardian but she wasn't ready to. I told her to come back and we would practice the conversation just like we had for the tampon talk. That was Monday. I'll follow-up with her today.

My job would be so much easier if it was just about band-aids and lice checks.

A Mother Long Enough to Know It Takes a Village

Last week I received a phone call from one of my sister-in-law's. She was concerned that Katelyn had posted a photo on Facebook that showed Katelyn's physical address. My SIL wanted to know if it was strange that she was concerned; would it be OK to tell Katelyn that she really shouldn't post things like that on Facebook. I had to smile because Dave and I have made several suggestions to Katelyn that she be a little more judicious and selective about the information she shares and she always says we are overreacting and only her friends can see what she posts because that is how she has set her privacy settings. So I told my SIL that she had my permission to parent my child and that maybe hearing from someone not her parent would prove more effective. I told my SIL that I  have been a mom long enough to not be offended when someone wants to parent my child/ren.

As I said those words I finally gained an understanding on what the phrase "it takes a village" really means. I used to be so offended by that phrase, as if by adhering to that notion was abdicating my responsibility as a parent. It doesn't mean that at all. It means to maintain fully responsibility to your parental duties but also be humble enough to know that you alone won't have all the answers on how to raise your child. The trick is in forming your community. It is imperative that you surround yourself with good people; people who share your core values. If you do that, you can trust their advice/guidance even if their parenting style isn't exactly like yours.

As my children have grown and they are influenced more by peers than parents, I knew I needed to rely on others in my community to help guide them or offer me some words of wisdom. You see, raising children can be so emotional and when you are in the thick of emotion sometimes it is difficult to see the situation clearly or to break from techniques that are comfortable, even if those techniques have been ineffective in the past. True, no one knows your child like you do, but sometimes a fresh set of eyes can lend a new perspective that just might cause you to pause and think about your own actions; reflection can be a powerful tool for personal improvement.

It has taken me several years (oh I'm guessing about 14 or so) to reach this point. I know I have said in the past "Don't tell me how to parent my child" but those words were usually said out of defense, when I was feeling attacked. Looking back on those situations I now realize the person wasn't trying to attack, and probably not really even trying to parent, just simply adding a fresh perspective to a situation that probably really could have used some fresh air instead of the same old stale argument.

I'm not sure if my SIL sent a Facebook message to Katelyn or not. Even if she didn't, I'm grateful that she thought about it. I have a good community filled with people I trust so go ahead, parent my children. I have been a mom long enough to know I don't have all the answers. But don't you dare break my trust...you hurt my children and the it could get real ugly.

Disappointed Customer

Have you ever left a business whose sole purpose is to provide customer service and wondered how in the world they are still in business? That was my exact thought as I left the travel agent yesterday. I had gone seeking assistance on planning our trip to South Carolina. I was hoping to get information on sites to see, possible travel packages with suggested activities, etc. What I got was the same flight information I had found on travelocity and the statement from the travel agent "Thanks for coming in. Sorry we couldn't find you any great deals."

That was it. There were no tourist pamphlets or brochures given to me, even though Charleston was just voted the #1 best vacation destination by some travel company. There were no suggestions on where to stay. The whole visit couldn't have been more than 5 minutes at the most. I guess in a way I'm glad that the visit didn't waste more of my time, but still, it was very disappointing.

So I guess I'm back to planning, researching, buying, reserving, etc.; all things I'm pretty good at and mostly enjoy doing. But I was ready to let someone else do that for us.

Hog Heaven

When Dave was in college, going through the drudgery of engineering classes, he dreamt of days when he would get to design awesome toys and then find fun ways to test them out.

Today was a dream fulfilled. He had a successful test of a new product.

The next test step is taking a trip to Georgia to try the product out in the "field".

The trip may or may not require some hog hunting.

 He was like a little kid at Christmas when he got his itinerary.

And I may or may not have been like a jealous little sister thinking he gets all the fun things and gets to have awesome trip adventures.