Ways Children Keep You Humble

It seems like there is an endless amount of ways children can draw attention to your flaws. When they are toddlers, they decide to throw amazing, out-of-control tantrums at the most inopportune times just so they can see how you are going to handle all of the unwanted attention. Seriously, haven't you just about wanted to crawl under a rock when one of those screaming fits rears its ugly head. I mean, you are in a no-win situation. You get the "eye roll" from those who wonder why in the world you aren't doing a better job of controlling that monster you call a child. Or you get the "pity smile" from those who have been there, done that. Either response makes you feel like an utter failure as a parent (well, at least that's how I felt more often than not). Then they get a little bigger and become more verbal. This leads to more direct attacks on your flaws. I once had a 3rd grader tell me my lips were really gross (I have chronically chapped lips, no matter what treatment I use). And then they turn into teen-agers and really know how to cut you to the quick. Recent conversation involving son, daughter, and me... Brother to sister (sister says she's not hungry and doesn't want to eat dinner): What? Is getting a "muffin top" your biggest nightmare? Me: It's my biggest nightmare. Daughter to me: Mom, you already have a muffin top. Thud. That was me falling down several notches on the self-esteem scale. When I asked her later if she would ever consider saying that to her friends, she said "No way." I then asked why she thought it would be OK to say such a thing to me and she had really no response. Maybe she had heard her dad say to me when we were discussing cosmetic enhancements (I have always wanted to have a nose job)..."Honey, I married you with that nose. But I would be OK with you having lipo because that wasn't the stomach you had when I married you."