Still Adjusting

For the most part I am settling into empty-nesting quite nicely. I mean who can complain about getting a long, hot shower every morning? Or not having to worry about getting children out the door to all their various activities? And what 's not to like about being able to have spontaneous date nights with no worries about who might be available for babysitting? Oh, and there is hardly ever any disagreements over what TV show to watch. And for sure no complaining or back talk is heard in our house these days.

But truth be told, sometimes during the hours of 3-7 p.m. I am totally lonely. I know when the kids were home I complained about the frenzied pace of those hours. Some days I wondered how I was going to get everything done; how was I going to clone myself so I could be in 3 places at once. Those were the hours when I was just looking for a little peace and quiet; when I couldn't wait for David to get home so I could tag out.

I don't know if I wished those times away, but if I did, shame on me because now I miss them. I miss having a million places to be and watching my children be involved in several different activities. I miss the noise and chaos that often occurred during those late afternoon, early evening hours. Now I find that I have those hours completely to myself. The peace and quiet that I longed for? Well, now I have it.

Somebody asked me what I do during that time. I honestly replied "A whole lot of nothing." I just can't find it within myself to be self-motivated enough to do something. Well, I guess that is not entirely true. Some days after school I volunteer to time at whatever sport is currently going on at the middle school. And I still attend city council meetings regularly. I also have planning commission meetings on the 2nd and 4th Thursday of the month. So I guess I'm not a total lump. But on the days/nights when I don't have something to do? Well, then I'm lonely. Dave is working until 6 or 6:30 most nights these days. And then he usually works out after so some nights he isn't home until 7:30.

Dave's late nights brings up another area of empty-nesting to which I am having trouble adjusting. That is the area of cooking. You would think that since I have so much quiet, uninterrupted time in the late afternoon/early evening, I should be preparing some fabulous meals. But I'm not. Honestly, I just don't have the desire to cook if I'm going to be eating by myself. Well, actually, even if Dave were home to eat I'm not sure that I would cook. It just seems like such a bother. It's hard to guess how much to cook for 2 and Dave hates leftovers so if there is extra it just goes to waste. And throwing away food really bugs me, too so again, I just don't cook. The funny thing is I always have grand plans to make some fabulous meals, I even purchase ingredients for the meals, but when the time comes to make the meal. Meh, who cares?

So this empty-nest thing is going pretty OK. There were some things that I eagerly accepted, like only having to worry about me in the mornings. But there are still some things I'm struggling with, like all of this alone time and what to do. Looking forward to next week. It's Carson's spring break. I'm sure he'll complain that we aren't doing anything and that there is no food in the house. This time I'll accept the complaining because it means that I'm not alone.