The F Word

Yes, that F word.

The four letter word that rhymes with truck.

The mother of all swear words. The word uttered by Ralphie as he watched the bolts he was supposed to be holding go flying through the air. The word that earned him a bar of soap in his mouth as soon as he got home.

I was about Ralphie's age when I first used that word. I think I was yelling at some boy in our neighborhood. My dad must have been the one who overheard me yell the expletive because he is the one who meted out my punishment. My consequence was not a bar of soap in my mouth. That would have been too easy. No, my punishment involved listening  to my dad explain what the F-word truly meant. That it was a derogatory slang word for sex. He then went on to make sure that I understood what sex was. I don't remember his exact words, but I'm sure I was squirming as he was talking to me about the subject. A bar of soap in my mouth would have probably been a preferred consequence.

I was reminded of that long-ago conversation the other day as I read an Instragram post that ended with the 'Grammer saying she ended her workout feeling strong AF. AF is short for "as f ***". AF has become a phrase that people often use to add emphasis to how they are feeling.

But as I read the AF, I had myself a giggle as I substituted the word "sex" for the f-word. After all, that is what the f-word means. So this girl finished her workout feeling strong as sex. Well, good for her.

Then I began to think, what would happen if people really started thinking about what they were saying and using the real word, not the slang term? Can you imagine...

Guilty AF turns into guilty as sex. Wow, if sex is causing you guilt, sounds like an issue that needs to be resolved.

Dirty AF turns into dirty as sex. Well, that says a little more about you than I really want to know.

Happy AF turns into happy as sex. Sex should be a happy thing, so I guess this one isn't too bad.

Or how about, when crying out "F***" in frustration, you just yell out "SEX". Hope that brings you some relief.

Anyway, the point is, I was reminded of my dad's lecture about what the F word really means and the phrase AF sounds pretty silly if you substitute the word "sex" for the f-word.

Oh, after my dad talked to me, I did stop using that word for awhile. I went through a stretch in junior high and high school where it was my favorite word. But sometime during my senior year in high school, I just quit using it. Haven't said it since...and apparently, can't type it out in full either. LOL.